Comparison in Your Business

Hey Tribe! I'm incredibly happy that you've taken the time to listen to the podcast today! I appreciate you all so freaking much. Sharing helpful advice with you fills me with joy, and I'm excited to dive into today's topic! 

Today, I'm going to talk all about comparison-itis — comparing yourself to other people. We frequently compare our achievements to others, whether related to your business, social media influence, or lifestyle. These days, social media makes comparing yourself to others more instantaneous and more frequent. It's difficult to look at someone else's success on Instagram or Facebook and not immediately compare it to your own life. Comparison-itis is practically unavoidable right now.

I know that you all have heard the clichés about comparisons hundreds of times, like how comparing yourself to others is the "thief of joy." Countless mentors and teachers have denounced it, but I have a different take that might surprise you — comparison is actually a good thing. 

Comparison can be a beneficial tool in growing your business and brand if you use it properly. I wouldn't be making the impact that I am or overshooting my income goals for the year if I didn't compare myself to others. It can make or break your business, so we're going to discuss how to grow from comparison rather than let it tear us down. 

The Science Behind Comparison 

Before we dive into how to utilize comparisons to benefit us, let's take a step back and ask ourselves why we even do it. It's such an instantaneous, natural thing that we don't do it consciously — it just happens. Our brain wiring makes comparisons as a survival tactic, especially in new situations. When you're in a new situation, your brain shuffles through old memories to relate the new experience to something you have previously done. That way, it makes sense of the current situation and feels safe moving forward with the activity. 

The brain doesn't always have a memory to associate the new experience with, so it searches other memories that you didn't personally experience. For example, I want to purchase a new bikini for the beach, and my brain is associating the purchase with something that I didn't personally experience. My brain goes back to 1999 when Marissa Miller was on the cover of a magazine in a bikini. My brain naturally made that connection, and now I'm comparing myself to her and wondering, "How do I get her abs?" It's an experience that my brain distinctly remembers, even though I didn't personally experience it. 

The same thing happens when it comes to business. If you don't have personal experience with something, you're going to compare yourself to other people's success. If you've never done Instagram live, you're going to make associations and compare yourself to notable Instagram live streams that you've seen because your brain is shuffling through your memories. If you are inexperienced with business, your brain makes associations with the people that you know and the people that you see on social media. 

The question we need to ask ourselves is whether these comparisons help us or hinder us. Comparisons can be a healthy and helpful thing if we utilize them the right way. I wouldn't be running a strong business and making an impact if I didn't use comparisons to learn and grow.

I often compare myself to my friends, people in my mastermind groups, and my mentors. I find pieces of myself and pieces of my past in their stories of success, and then I realize that if they can do it, I can do it. I can be where they are. I know that I can grow my business as large as they can, and I can reach the same income benchmarks as them. You use other people's success to build yourself up and motivate you rather than use it to tear yourself down! 

Don't Let Comparison Own You 

Seeing other peoples' success will not hurt you if your sense of self-worth is secure. If you do not feel confident in yourself, then comparing yourself to others will crush you every day. It is essential for your business and for your sense of wellbeing to build your confidence. You need to work on yourself and grow your self-esteem — become confident in your capabilities and recognize your worth and your strengths. 

Realize that you are awesome at what you do and recognize your potential to do great things. Don't let comparisons own you — own your strengths, your leadership, and your voice. Feel confident in what you can accomplish and strive towards making a more significant impact! 

It does not bother or intimidate me when I hear other people's success stories because I recognize my self-worth. I've made an effort over the years to develop my strengths and to be confident in my impact. I use comparisons to grow rather than tear myself down because I know my worth, and I know what I can do. Through comparing myself to others, I can continue reaching towards leaving a greater impact and reaching my fullest potential, and so can you!

Make Self-Comparisons

An essential part of growing your confidence is recognizing your growth. The most important person that you can compare yourself to is yourself. Who were you this time six months ago? Who were you this time a year ago? Have you grown? Have you remained the same? Or do you find yourself struggling and going backward? These are essential questions to ask yourself if you want to improve your impact. 

If you're growing, then there's no reason to judge yourself and your progress. Continue replicating that growth and keep succeeding. Keep moving forward with your success and figure out how to keep charging ahead. 

If you find yourself not growing or having setbacks, get out there and find what you need to do to change. Find the help you need to push yourself forward to develop your strengths and your business. Make it a goal to recognize significant growth this time next year. Once you find that you're growing, then it's time to compare yourself to others to continue learning and developing.

Be Careful About Who You Choose to Compare Yourself To 

Comparison-itis is a helpful tool when we are comparing ourselves to the right people. Don't fall into the trap of comparing yourself to people who only look good on the surface. It’s easy to see someone's highlight reel on social media and assume that they're doing fabulously business-wise. People can have unseen problems in different areas of their lives hidden beneath their alluring Instagram feeds, so be scrutinizing with who you choose. I made this mistake several times by assuming various people I knew were successful entrepreneurs. I based their success solely on their lifestyles, but once I saw past that glossy surface, I realized that they were struggling financially to maintain the illusion of success. 

It is also essential that we do not make comparisons based on only one area of success. Do not make comparisons based solely on their business or their marriage or whatever else. Just because someone is doing great with their finances does not mean that they live a happy or satisfying life.

If you don't know what's going on in a person's life, then comparing yourself to them will not be helpful. It’s like that old cliché "Never judge a book by its cover." Don't compare yourself unless you know 100% what is going on with them. The friends and mentors that I choose to compare myself to are highly transparent and honest. I can ask them questions, and they will answer sincerely and truthfully because they're not hiding anything. Compare yourself to people that you know on the inside rather than the exterior that they project. Invest your time and money in people who are real, authentic, vulnerable, and honest. 

Another trap that we can fall into is comparing ourselves to people who are in a different stage of their business. Don't compare your beginning to someone else's middle or end. When I was first starting on Instagram, I found that I was critical of myself for not being as good at posing for pictures as my friends. My Instagram stories and photos were super awkward, and I couldn't help but compare my feed to successful influencers' feeds. Comparing myself to them wasn't helpful because they had a ton of experience, and I was only starting. A friend reminded me that this shit takes time, and I realized that I needed to focus my energy on improving myself rather than constantly comparing myself to people at a different stage. 

This is incredibly true when it comes to business — it takes time to get good at it. You'll improve as long as you focus your energy on growing. If I had continued constantly comparing my Instagram to others, I would have been too discouraged to continue, so it's crucial to avoid this kind of comparison. 

When you're looking at your favorite influencer, don't ask yourself, "How can I be that way?" Look at it and ask yourself, "How can I learn from this? What is it that I like about this?" and grow from it. Be patient with yourself, and continue moving forward. 

Comparison-itis will happen when you're in the process of growing your business. Make sure that you're growing in the comparisons rather than allowing them to discourage your progress. Use the experience and accomplishments of others to learn how to make more of an impact and grow your income rather than let it hinder you! 

I hope this episode helped every one of my listeners out there. If you found it helpful, take a screenshot, tag me in it, and share it on Instagram (thejennkennedy). I can't wait to connect with you, tribe! I'll talk to you soon! 

 

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